Seven steps to more sensual sex

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By Lockerz

 

 

 

Are your bedroom basics becoming boring? Spice up your repertoire and reignite the fires of passion in your relationship with these top tips from The Lovers' Guide


1 Pamper your senses
Sensual loving begins with indulging and lavishing attention on your body. When women feel stressed, tired or run-down, they often lose the desire for sex. Take time to give your body a treat; indulge yourself and awaken your five senses of smell, sound, sight, touch and taste.
Self-pampering gives our senses a kick-start. Book yourself a quiet night in; turn off your mobile, dim the lights and let yourself relax. Try having a long, hot bath with scented candles and sensual oils, whilst playing relaxing and uplifting music. Lie back, close your eyes and concentrate on taking deep breaths. This simple exercise will unlock your potential for relaxed, alert physical pleasure.

2 Enhance masturbation
Both women and men can be a little too goal-oriented when masturbating, focusing on the end point, rather than enjoying the whole journey. Savour the pleasure by prolonging the experience.
Let your hands wander all over your body, touching yourself as you would like a lover to touch you. Seek out your sensitive spots and linger on them; your buttocks and inner thigh can be especially sensitive.

When you are with your partner, masturbate together and show each other how you like to be touched. The more you and your partner can arouse each other all over, not just through the penis or clitoris, the more sensual your lovemaking will become.


3 Indulge in fantasies
Some people worry about their sexual fantasies, but really there's no need. Your fantasies are a healthy expression of your inner life. Don't worry if you wouldn't consider doing them in real life; this isn't 'real life,' so you can let yourself go.

Your fantasies might be romantic scenarios, involve 'kinky' toys, or be just downright depraved! They may involve sex in public, with more than one partner, or might even be forced sex fantasies - expressing an inner, often unconscious desire to break free of any sexual limits or repressions that you may have.

You might also want to share your fantasies with your partner - or play out a few . Even if you don't want to make your fantasies a reality, talking about them with your partner can take you both to a new level of intimacy.


4 Embrace emotional intimacy
Communication is the key to great sex. There might be things we feel we can't say for fear of being hurt, especially if we've had a bad experience or been let down in the past. However, if you can't communicate properly with a partner, you can become distant from one another - and that distance will affect your love-making.

Make sure you're able to ask for an 'emotional hold' when you need - be that a hug or some words of reassurance - and that you're able to offer the same when it's asked of you. Don't be afraid to show your partner your 'bad side' - any weaknesses you have, or ways in which you feel you don't quite match up.
Your sex life with your partner is a reflection of the rest of your relationship. A healthy level of emotional intimacy with each other will come through in the bedroom, and lead to a far more sensual experience for both of you.


5 Walk sexy, talk sexy, think sexy!
There's nothing sexier than confidence, especially when it spills out between the sheets! Even if you're not feeling confident, learn how to fake it!

Pretend that you're a confident woman that oozes sex appeal. It takes 28 days to change a habit, so if you start thinking every day that you are a beautiful woman who oozes sex appeal, in one month's time you will be that person.

People respond to the image portrayed, so if you think and act sexy, you'll find that the people around you will think that too!

Read more: Seven steps to more sensual sex | iVillage UK http://www.ivillage.co.uk/seven-steps-more-sensual-sex/82364#ixzz1gjeiK7YA

Dust off those high heels!

Good news ladies wearing high heels can be good for your sex life!

Experts found that wearing a 3-inch heel strengthened pelvic muscles, also increasing their ability to contract--it's an effortless, on-the-go version of Kegels.

Time to dust off the 5 inch heels! :)

Flirty Friday

I’m not sure if I’d use any of these as pick up lines or text messages to sexy pal....

 If I have a strong desire, don't say it is a sin. I'm already on fire, and just want to touch your skin. Flirty

In my dreams you're mine, in my life you're a dream.

You're eyes are soft en tender, as sweet as they can be. There's one thing you must remember, you are the one for me!!!

Your daddy must be a terrorist. Because you are DA BOMB!

If love is a crime, lock me up, I'm guilty baby!

I dream those eyes, those lips, that face, that body...Ok, enough about ME! Tell me something about you!

Never make love in the garden or in the fields...... Love might be blind but your neighbors aren't!

I think I should tell you what people are saying behind your back.... Nice Ass!!!!!!! Flirty

Do you know that you would look great with two pounds less ... in my opinion those clothes weigh exactly two pounds!

Love is a name, Sex is a game. Forget the name and play the game!

Do you know what does position 68 mean? .......You are doing me and I owe you one!!

Thursday Thirteen - 13 Ways to Feel Sexy

Busy schedules and unsuccessful diets are the primary reasons many of us don’t feel sexy.  Who can feel sexy when they feel tired and frumpy?  Women are beautiful creatures; we just need to remind ourselves of it periodically.  Now put the chocolate away (well, maybe not) for this one and take notes.  

1.       Do your make up and/or hair.  Have you ever noticed how good you feel after a visit to the beauty shop or when you get all dressed up?  You can capture that same feeling by paying a bit of attention to your self for a simply dinner at home.

2.       Visit a spa, take a long bath, or give yourself a facial.  Take a break to enjoy your own skin.  Touch it, caress it… then let your honey touch it and caress it.

3.       Work out.  Go to a gym, join Curves, or just get a couple of girlfriends to walk with daily.  The effort not only makes you healthy (may or may not lose weight), but you’ll notice little things about yourself that make you feel sexy.  Sometimes, just actually working out fires you up.

4.       Wear sexy clothing.  I don’t me movie star red carpet stuff or even hooker style.  A nice tight silk t-shirt that feels good when you wear it.  Or an old worn pair of jeans that really flatter your assets.  Look in your closet, take a close look at your favorites and think about how you feel when you wear them.  If they all make you want to take a nap… go shopping.

5.       Find a material that makes you feel good.  I don’t mean flannel because it makes you cozy; I’m talking about silk or cotton and how it feels against your skin.  When you find yourself feeling sexy in a particular fabric, purchase more items made with it.  Instead of your old blend button down shirts, try an inexpensive machine washable silk blouse.  It will go with everything from jeans to a pair of dress pants.

6.       Wear lingerie that flatters you.  Don’t buy something and wear it because it looks good on the mannequin or honey’s eyes bug out.  Wear it because it feels good and looks good on you. 

7.       Don’t worry about your appearance.  Everyone has flaws; just no one else cares about them as much as you do.  So what that you have a scar from a surgery or a little pouch from having kids.

8.       Plan at least one sensual experience a week for you love.  Planning a sensual escapade can be very arousing.  Add a little teasing in there to build confidence.

9.       Take a shower together.  Hmmm… water, wet, skin, slippery… oh, ah…

10.   Dance seductively with your partner.  Turn on the music just for the two of you.  Have fun and do some dirty dancing.

11.   Try being the dominant one in the next love-making session.  Being in control can be a rush and very sexy.

12.   Accept compliments regarding you looks and abilities.  This can be a simple lesson in building confidence; and confidence is very sexy.

13.   Allow yourself to feel sexy.   Take time to reconnect with yourself.  Try to find things that work for you, that make you feel good about you and sexy… and then do them.

What makes you feel sexy?

13 Sexy New Year Resolutions

So many New Year Resolutions are made and quickly forgotten. Not only are these promises easily forgotten when we are caught up in the hustle of everyday life, but also we can forget about the love in our lives. Try making a few resolutions that won't be forgotten and easily obtainable. Make your relationship with that special someone a priority, put pleasure first on your resolution list.

1. Plan to have more sex. We schedule time to shop, get our hair done, take the kids to soccer... Being spontaneous is not always easy and by some simple plans to be more sexual, you'll actually end up having more sex.

2. Get away from it all. Send the kids away for the weekend or escape for a night alone. Grab a movie, dinner and a romp in a cheap hotel. Use this time to NOT talk about family, friends or work. Focus on each other.

3. Do some redecorating in the bedroom. Our surrounding have a significant impact on how we feel. Turn your bedroom into a sensual room. Add some sexy satins, new pillows, mirrors, incense or candles, artwork to create an environment to bring out your sexual animal.

4. Exercise more. I'm talkin' the horizontal mambo three /four times a week. Not only are calories being burned in a super fun way, but with each orgasmic session your endorphins (the chemical in your brain that makes you happy) will do miracles for your mood and zest for life!

5. Stop the sensory deprivations. Get off the computer, turn off the cell phone, put down the e-reader. It's time to get your hands into life! Cook with your honey and savor every tasty moment. Inhale life's scents and enjoy the fragrance of the world around you whether it be a sensual perfume or the way the air smells after a rain shower. Gaze into your partner's eyes and drown in the lipid pools of desire.

6. Save your money and give each other full body massages. Invest in some scented massage candles and let your inhibitions fly out the window. Pick up some edible massage oil. Don't leave out the happy ending!

7. Eat in bed. Whipped cream, chocolate body paint, honey dust! Decadent and suggestive foods coupled with steamy sex make a rather delicious combination.

8. Make food a sensual part of your life. Forget the chips and go for the juicy, creamy and succulent stuff. Fresh strawberries, ripe peaches, and bananas can be cut into bite sizes. Finger food can be very sensual; take your time eating to experience the textures and flavors. Savoring food can be great practice for savoring sex.

10. Make yourself feel more sexy every day. Go through your panty drawer and buy yourself some new sexier styles. Lose the flannels, the old rugby jersey and stop lounging about with holey socks. Try some sexy silk pajamas or simple lingerie you can wear under your clothes. Treating yourself to sexier underclothes will help you tap into your sexy side. Indulge in a new fragrance that makes your partner hot. Wax, shave, work out... whatever makes you feel good about yourself and sexy.

11. Have an affair - with your partner of course! Here's your chance to have fun with a sexual fantasy. Share your fantasies with each other or create one together then act on them. Dress as a seductive stranger and meet at a secret location, hotel, or bar. Have fun with costumes, they can be just what you need to get started.

12. Get back to the basics. Rediscover the art of kissing. Spend a night simply "making out". Just be careful if you go "parking". Be open and honest with your partner by sharing what really turns you on. Be romantic by leaving notes with hints and sexy suggestions where your honey will find them. Take time to explore each other's bodies to learn likes and dislikes. Be open to pleasure.

13. Be more playful and creative. Try something sexually new. Play with sex toys. Visit a swingers' club. Get a book on sexual positions and try all of them at least once. For a more spiritual sex life, study Kama Sutra. Take a class on strip tease or belly dancing. Pick up a couple sex games and play. Feel free to visit your local adult store, the staff is very discreet and helpful.

One of my favorite shops is Lovers' Lane.   I feel comfortable working with the staff and have enjoyed every purchase!

Things you should know if you are acquainted with a writer

(Yes, this is borrowed.)

1. It's not that I'm anti-social. It's just that I'm currently writing at least three books in my head. It's hard to mentally outline and talk at the same time.

2. I'm not staring at your ear because I'm a stalker with a weird fetish. You just did something that gave me an idea for my WIP.

3. I'm not talking to myself. I'm PLOTTING.

4. You mangled the spelling of that word and yes, it will eat at me FOR HOURS.

5. Please don't reference any mainstream, highly successful novels unless you know for sure that they are free of typos and weak writing. And make sure there are no adverbs in it. Otherwise, you'll set off a literary hissy fit of epic proportions.

6. James Patterson is the Antichrist. Don't ask me why. Because I'll tell you. Ad nauseum.

7. IT IS NOT A F***ING HOBBY!

8. Yes, I'm neurotic. I'm a writer, duh.

When have you ever met a sane writer?

9. Meet my delicate artist ego. Stroke it. Praise it. It will purr for you. Then it will cry. Then it will accuse you of being disingenuous. Then it will tell you to go to hell. Then it will beg you to like it. Then it will be aloof. Then it will curl itself into the fetal position and suck its thumb until you stroke it again.

10. Don't ask where I get my story ideas. How the crap should I know? It's not like I have a storage locker....

I LOVE BEING A WRITER!

Happy Winter Solstice

Late dawn. Early sunset. Short day. Long night.

For us in the northern hemisphere,

the December solstice marks the longest night and shortest day of the year.

Worldwide, interpretation of the event has varied from culture to culture, but most northern hemisphere cultures have held a recognition of rebirth, involving holidays, festivals, gatherings, rituals or other celebrations around that time.

BURN A CANDLE ON WINTER SOLSTICEThis is a practice associated with nearly every winter holiday: Christmas and Hanukkah being two that come readily to mind. But did you know the lighting of candles on or around the Winter Solstice dates back to the belief that although daylight hours are short on Winter Solstice, it is time to celebrate the return of the light (we'll gain small amounts of sunlight after the Solstice, starting with one minute increments, daily) and to actually "call" and "hold" the light?

Something very cool and powerful happens when we observe this tradition. We capture a little solar light and magic for ourselves, in the process. We feel healed and and revived, enlivened and energized. Who doesn't want that?! Here's what to do.

Light a white candle on the morning of the Winter Solstice (I light mine at sunrise) and say these words aloud:

Solstice sun, rising in the sky
Power of light now draws nigh
Soon it will be the longest night
Solstice energy, bless my life

Traditional candle colors to use are white to symbolize light itself, green to symbolize enduring life even in the cold of winter (hence the evergreen tree at the holidays!) or a rich red for protection and health during the winter months. If you would like to, and it you can do so safely, you may keep a candle burning continuously all day long, from sunrise to sundown on the Winter Solstice. Older cultures would keep their candles and more specifically, their Yule Log burning from sunrise all through the Winter Solstice night.

Taken from the book A Tale for all Seasons: MAGICAL STORIES FOR HEART & SOUL by Jo Lynne Valerie

We have a winner.....

CONGRATS TO

Amber (VampedChik)

who won a PDF download of

Handcuffs & Silk

Whoot-whoot! 

Stuff Your Stockings Christmas Blog Hop 2011

Welcome to the Stuff Your Stocking Blog Hop.  You probably just hopped in from Romance Writers Behaving Badly.  I hope you had a Holiday beverage handy as you read those HOT posts from those naughty authors. Do you need a minute to catch your breath?

Remember to leave a comment for a chance to win a PDF download of my latest book Handcuffs & Silk.

Your next stop on the hop after here will be exciting as you dive into a writer's world with erotic author Louisa Bacio. 

"The mistletoe is hung up near a doorway or in the kitchen and young men have the privilege of kissing girls under it, plucking each time a berry from the bush. When the berries are all plucked the privilege ceases."

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The tradition of kissing under the mistletoe is one of my favorites and I believe a lot of kissing under the mistletoe has been going on for ages.  In today's tradition the part about plucking the berries (which, incidentally, are poisonous), and then all kissing under the mistletoe ends when the berries run out!

As a little girl, my mother told me how a young lady standing under a ball of mistletoe, brightly trimmed with evergreens, ribbons, and ornaments, cannot refuse to be kissed. Such a kiss could mean deep romance or lasting friendship and goodwill. If the girl remained unkissed, she cannot expect not to marry the following year.

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I found references of "kissing under the mistletoe" in Celtic rituals and Norse mythology. In Gaul, the land of the Celts, for instance, the Druids considered it a sacred plant. It was believed to have medicinal qualities and mysterious supernatural powers.  (Hmm... I wonder what kind of "power" I would have if I wear a piece of mistletoe on my coat.  After all... I am Scandinavian.)

The Norse myth of Baldur. Baldur's death and resurrection is one of the most fascinating Norse myths and stands at the beginning of the history of mistletoe as a "kissing" plant.

Baldur's mother was the Norse goddess, Frigga. When Baldur was born, Frigga made each and every plant, animal and inanimate object promise not to harm Baldur. But Frigga overlooked the mistletoe plant -- and the mischievous god of the Norse myths, Loki, took advantage of this oversight.
Ever the prankster, Loki tricked one of the other gods into killing Baldur with a spear fashioned from mistletoe. The demise of Baldur, a vegetation deity in the Norse myths, brought winter into the world, although the gods did eventually restore Baldur to life. After which Frigga pronounced the mistletoe sacred, ordering that from now on it should bring love rather than death into the world.

Happily complying with Frigga's wishes, any two people passing under the plant from now on would celebrate Baldur's resurrection by kissing under the mistletoe.

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I have my mistletoe hanging.  Do you?

Leave a comment for a chance to win a PDF of Handcuffs and Silk

Decadent Publishing A 1 Night Stand Story Stephanie "Stiff" Johnson, is a tough Las Vegas cop who many men find too intimidating to date. Steph begins to wonder if something is wrong with her so she turns to Madame Eve to find a man who could be the yin to her yang, even if it's just for one night. Hunter Morgan left behind years of living as a sub to a female Domme in New York. Upon return to his hometown, he questions whether he wants to continue with the "lifestyle" or find something different. Turning to 1 Night Stand, he hopes to sample his options. A simple one-night stand opens a whole new sensuous world to both. Genre: Contemporary romance, erotic romance, BDSM

Your next stop on the hop after here will be exciting as you dive into a writer's world with erotic author Louisa Bacio.

Thursday Thirteen - Sensual Touch

Something as simple as a touch can arouse a person. Unfortunately in today’s world the act of slow, sensitive, exploring touches is often forgotten when it comes to romance and love making. Humans from early on are affected and nurtured through touching. As adults, we still crave to touch and be touched; an act relevant to initiate us into the mysteries of sex. Touching each other is a form of communication showing trust, love, desire, as well as an opportunity to learn about each other.

Here is a list of 13 erogenous zones that are most likely to provoke sensual responses.

1. Scalp and Hair. The scalp is very sensitive to touch and who doesn’t enjoy having someone run fingers through their hair?

2. Ears and Neck. Possibly amount the most sensitive parts of the body. Being stroked, nibbled, or licked or even feeling a lover’s hot breath in this area can be very arousing.

3. The Waist. Not often thought of as an erogenous zone, but a bit of kissing, licking, squeezing, and stroking can have an erotic effect. Personally, I like to feel my honey’s hands on my waist. Try it.

4. The Torso. The sides of the torso can be surprisingly responsive to touch, especially light brushing of fingertips or gentle nibbling.

5. The Spine. Very sensitive area you may need to discuss with your partner to see what is preferred. Try a warm touch with lotion or a cold touch with an ice cube.
6. The Chest. Although not as sensitive as the breasts, try light, teasing strokes and slow lingering caresses to create a pleasurable sensual touch.

7. Breasts. Duh. But did you know a man’s nipples are actually more sensitive than a woman’s?

8. The Thighs. The inside of the thighs is highly sensitive. The closer the touch is to the groin, the more exquisite and arousing will be the sensations.

9. The Backs of the Legs. The hollows at the backs of the knees are especially sensitive to touch; try soft touches with fingertips or gentle kisses.

10. The Butt. I love a tight ass. Hmm… there are numerous ways of touching the butt. Try ranging from feather light caresses to squeezing and even spanking.

11. The Face. Yes, cheeks and lips but try placing a kiss on the eyelids. Hmmm…. Feels great giving and receiving.

12. The Neck and Throat. This area responds wonderfully to gentle kisses and delicate fingertip caresses.

13. The Feet. Another area you may need to discuss with your partner. While some people enjoy feet others may be turned off by them. This area is very sensitive to touch from the tips of the toes to the ankle. A foot massage is a great form of relaxing as well.

What is your favorite erogenous zone and how do you like to be touched?