Friday Funnies - Bad Pickup Lines

 Bad pickup lines are sad but funny.

 1. If I have a strong desire, don't say it is a sin. I'm already on fire, and just want to touch your skin.

2. You're eyes are soft and tender, as sweet as they can be. There's one thing you must remember, you are the one for me!!!

3. Your daddy must be a terrorist. Because you are DA BOMB!

4. If love is a crime, lock me up, I'm guilty baby!

5. I dream those eyes, those lips, that face, that body...Ok, enough about ME! Tell me something about you!

6. I think I should tell you what people are saying behind your back.... Nice Ass!!!!!!! Flirty

7. Do you know that you would look great with two pounds less ... in my opinion those clothes weigh exactly two pounds!

8. Love is a name, Sex is a game. Forget the name and play the game!

9/ Do you know what does position 68 mean? .......You are doing me and I owe you one!!

Say Whaaaat? Calorie Counts

 

A teaspoon of semen contains approximately 5 calories.

A minute long kiss can burn 2-5 calories, depending on how intimate it is.

Studies have confirmed sex does equate to light-moderate exercise. 

Sex burns off an average of about 100-200 calories per session.

The top calorie burning sex positions:

1. The Butter Churner 211 calories

2. Standing 198 calories

3. Doggie Style: 182 calories

Note: Men burn calories faster than women.

In 2020, Apple watches kept track of calories burned during sex.

Tempting Tuesday: Sleepwear

 

There comes a stage in every relationship when things just start to get a little too comfortable and you find yourself starting to reason that it's okay to wear those flannel pajamas, leggings and ratty t-shirts to bed. Those tempting, sexy items are pushed to the back of the closet.

Well, if you are about one night's sleep away from pulling out that frumpy, granny nightgown you swore you'd never wear... STOP!   There are lots of sleepwear options out there that are as equally sexy as they are comfy.

I don't mean you have to pack away those sexy little lace or leather outfits for good.  Heavens to Betsy... don't do that!  However, the sleepwear you choose to wear on a nightly basis doesn't have to come out of your mother's closet!  (No offense, Mom.)

You can find sleep wear from sensuous silk and satin to cozy cotton and even flannel at Victoria's Secret.  Silky chemises and sexy camisoles worn with drawstring PJ pants or shorts can be found in many stores.

Soft fabrics that feel good against your skin will make you feel relaxed, comfortable and still sexy.  You just won't have to tolerate the binding thong or itchy lace bodice that's squeezing the girls to tightly.  Your honey might occasionally settle for cuddling in front of the TV rather than jumping your bones 7 nights a week...well...maybe.